Why is it so hard to trust someone who has previously lied to you?
Answer by Ella Louise:
Unfortunately, the ultimate outcome of lying is mistrust.
You don’t trust them because you haven’t been given reason to.
Trust is earned. When you meet anyone knew, you don’t trust them straight off the bat. They have to prove they are worthy, and visa versa.
If this person has lied to you, regardless of whether they have apologised, rationalised or reasoned, at the end of the day they have proved, simply, that they cannot be trusted.
This does not mean, however, that trust cannot be earned back. People are not perfect and mistakes are made everyday.
In this instance, you may be finding it hard to regain the faith in their loyalty as they have yet to prove it.
Give it time and you may find that they are worth trusting and that the loyalty is there. However, you may also confirm that this isn’t so, in which case you keep this person at arms length and do not rely on them.
If they are not truly trustworthy then you have not suffered any great loss.